Traveling with a Special Child. “I am for mobile life and minimalism - it’s easier that way” - Interview with Oleg Lazhechnikov Why Thailand

– a blog about travel, wintering in Thailand and more, remote work and making money on the Internet. Oleg is also the father of a special boy, Yegor.

I met with Oleg and talked about various topics: work, life hacks, travel, comfortable clothes and shoes...

About the blog

Your blog has a lot of information about Thailand: attractions, prices, instructions... How did you come to this?

When I first started blogging, I didn't have a visible goal. Just a blog. The standard scheme is that what I see is what I write about. Over the years, I have formed my own specific vision of how to do a blog.

I realized that earnings play an important role - I have no other sources of income. On the other hand, I wanted to do what I loved. So I started working in a different way. I started writing not only about what I see - there was a stream of information articles. I realized that it is easier to make money with such articles. Moreover, people still need this information.

Why Thailand?

After we visited there for the first time, I was almost planning to move there. And then I wanted to tailor my blog to Thailand. That's what I did for a couple of years.

Now, however, you write less about Thailand. Has the vector of blog development changed?

First, the Crisis. The wintering trend has collapsed. If you look at the statistics of search queries, Thailand is searched 2 times less. Traffic on Runet dropped by 2 times. Revenues associated with the Thai business also fell.

Secondly, I have already written so much about Thailand.

Thirdly, we are not permanently in Thailand. In theory, you need to do this all year round, and not occasionally - hop! – I arrived, and then you don’t write at all for a year.

Where's the money?

Where is the money on the Internet now?

They are everywhere. You just need to find your niche.

What if we take away the personality?

Will not work.

People are different. I would roughly divide everyone into 2 types:

• Moneymakers who, by and large, don’t care how they earn money. The income itself is important to them. They build a scheme and make money from it. As a rule, these are “short” schemes lasting several months. Then the topic dies, and they look for a new one.
• Creative people like me. They pick at longer-lived topics.

An example of a moneymaker is an arbitrage specialist who sells traffic at a higher price than he bought it. As a rule, traffic flows to various affiliate programs. My friend, when he was an arbitrator, made great money. It seems that he worked with online games and sold some courses for dummies, but he didn’t really share any secrets.

It didn't work out for me with arbitration. Apparently, analytics is not very good, but for arbitrage traders this is important.

It's all not mine. My work is more creative. I write posts to make them useful and interesting. And this is exactly how I earn money (Farid’s note: Oleg used to regularly post his income).

The first steps of a blogger

A person has a desire to tell the world about something, to start his own blog. Where should he start?

Usually it is advised to choose a theme or, for example, an engine. But it seems to me that the most important thing is to answer the question of whether you are going to make money from your blog.

An answer like “I’ll try” is bad. I see that people who answered this way are abandoning their blogs. They blog as a hobby, maybe they don’t even blog badly, but after 2-3 years they realize that there is no money, there are no goals for the blog, and they “give up.” They are disappointed, they say that it is impossible to make money on a blog, etc.

I've been through this myself. But then I decided that I had a money making goal and I started working towards it.

Can we say that to earn money you need to write for the reader, but for the soul - for yourself?

Yes and no. Some balance is needed.

Working with information

I like the way you work with information. Your posts are real booklets. Recommend how to learn all this? Maybe read something?

It takes practice. I'm always trying to improve something.

Although, of course, occasionally I read something. But I won’t say that I massively study some smart books or take some courses.

The main thing is that I enjoy working with the blog. If I didn't like it, I would have given up long ago.

Also, I always try to look at the blog through the eyes of the user and do what would be convenient for me. Although, of course, the understanding of which site is convenient and which is not changes over time. A site that seemed convenient to us 10 years ago, we will go to it and spit. For example, we are used to pages on social networks being updated without rebooting, but this appeared quite recently.

As for my blog, there is no time for anything serious - testing, studying Yandex Webvisor, etc. - and it is too difficult. And hiring someone is expensive - I found out.

Give me some simple advice

As a reader, I stopped accepting posts where everything was thrown together. Therefore, the tips are:

1. Present information structurally, without flowing from one thing to another.
2. Does not work? Write yourself a logical plan in advance.
3. Divide everything into paragraphs. It is impossible to read paragraphs 5-10 cm in height. But it’s not good when the paragraph is only one sentence.
4. Add headings and subheadings.
5. If you write about a place, add a map.

How to work with photos?

If this is an informational post, I wouldn't overload it with photos.

The main thing is that the photo is relevant. For example, it’s easier to take a photo of a bus schedule and post it than to describe it in words.

I also don’t like it when beautiful, sleek photos from Google or a stock photo are added to an article. It is important that it is clear that you took the photo yourself. This also improves the credibility of the author. Roughly speaking, when you write about a bus, you attach a common photo of yourself sitting on the bus, and not a photo of the bus found on the Internet.

I shoot in RAW because you can do a lot with it and it's forgiving. And all processing has been done in Adobe Photoshop Lightroom for many years.

When uploading, photos are run through a standard filter, and then I quickly go through them manually. I don’t make a masterpiece out of them, because it’s not necessary for the blog, but it seems to me that my photos turn out okay.

Writing skills

Are you doing something in this direction? Have you ever worked on your style? Or is this also spontaneous?

Mostly spontaneously.

Although I know that there are different copywriting courses and different manuals. Before my eyes, a person dramatically improved his style after such classes.

Looking back at your earliest articles, has your style changed?

Yes. It has become more informational and educational. When I go to old articles, I am horrified)) I’m even itching to redo them, but the articles there are not very important, so I leave everything as it is.

Overall, the style has become more structural. Even when I write “philosophical” articles, this is noticeable. It’s easier for me to write, and it’s easier for me to perceive. Precisely in blocks.

Working with a blog

Are there any blogs you look up to?

Probably not.

I know you update old posts to keep them relevant. Cool! You do this on a regular basis, right?

Yes. Mainly it's Thailand, which I try to keep up to date. Well, except for the prices, of course. Although prices in Thailand do not change much. And on other issues: visas, bank cards, SIM cards, etc. - everything is relevant.

Is it difficult to maintain relevance without being in the country itself?

Truly important news is hard to miss. Immediately, Thai groups begin to be full of messages like: “wow, horror, double-entry visas have been cancelled!” - you won't miss this. And sometimes someone may write in the comments to an article that the information is irrelevant, that things are different now.

And I immediately run and edit the text. It happens that the entire post has to be redone.

Oleg - freelancer

You are such a distinct freelancer.

More like an Internet entrepreneur.

Well, OK. Remote worker. Is remote work ruling?))

I used to work in an office:

But I didn’t really like it there. Moreover, it wasn’t so much the work in the office that was soaring, but the dragging through Moscow traffic jams for an hour and a half in each direction.

At the office, I always waited until 6:00 p.m. so I could go home as quickly as possible. Remotely, it’s the other way around—I could be off work for several days, changing a design or finishing an interesting post—I wanted to work so bad.

How do you get ready for work? Many freelancers have a problem with the mood to work. Aren't household members, different sounds and smells distracting?

At the beginning, I even liked it - that I didn’t have separate time for rest and for work. Everything flowed smoothly from one to another. Yes, I knew that this was ineffective, but I was initially in the mood for a calm mode. Worked - rested, worked again - rested again.

Then I had income goals. Now, I understand that something needs to change. I haven’t decided what and how yet.

The only thing we do in this regard is that when we travel, we try to rent a two-bedroom apartment. To have a room where I can go. In Moscow, we live in a one-room apartment, and I don’t work very well here. All this switching between family and work is hard. The only option is to put on headphones and turn on something loud.

In general, I’m basically mentally tired right now, most likely because of the situation with the child, and even when I’m in perfect silence, it still takes me a long time to get ready. Literally everything distracts me: social media. networks, comments and everything else.

By the way, how many comments do you have per day on your blog?

Differently. If the articles were not published, then 10-30. But if an article comes out, especially if it’s “philosophical,” then you might be out for half a day.

Have you tried renting an office? For example, I rented an ordinary apartment together with a freelance friend (I wrote about this )

Renting a one-room apartment in Moscow costs 25-30,000.

But this is not the main thing. The main thing is that we are constantly traveling, and we are unable to make long-term plans. I’m not ready to spend that kind of money on an office alone, and I can’t “dump” people and take off somewhere.

I hope that in the near future we will leave not for the winter, but for several years. I'm looking forward to when we finally decide. My wife and I just can’t come to an agreement - there are a lot of nuances because of the child and his rehabilitation.

When we leave for 1-2 years, I will definitely rent either an office or some separate room. Small - I don't need much.

What about coworking spaces?

Yes, there are many coworking spaces in Moscow. I tried to find something in my area or at least in a couple of metro stations, but I couldn’t find anything. But I don’t want to drag myself somewhere through traffic jams, this ruins my original idea of ​​freelancing without a way to the office.

Assistants

Do you have an assistant?

I’ve had an assistant for six months now—a content manager. There are small tasks on it that I used to forget about:

• write a short “technical” text (a piece of historical information, for example),
• change links in a number of posts,
• change markers in links,
• add descriptions for categories,
• place markers on the map, etc..

Does she work full time?

No. I give the task and she does it when she has time. Payment is piecework.

How did you find her?

This is a reader of my blog. We have been communicating with her for a long time. I offered her this job because I like the way she writes.

Previously, your wife also wrote to you. Less now?

She hasn't written for a long time. With the advent of her son, she deals mainly with him. From time to time she tries to do something, but she still can’t “sign”... Over the entire period of the blog, I have 1000+ posts, and hers is ~50. And most of it was written in the first year. I don't think it's really hers. It was more like a hobby, something optional.

Do you often resort to the help of freelancers? And where do you find them?

Mainly copyright. Some informational articles, but only if the person is in the know. If you order a text about Thailand, then only from someone who has been there and spent more than a week as a “packer”. Who can specifically write that he has been going to this beach for several months and knows all its nuances.

Trips

How has the Crisis affected travelers? What changed?

The answer is banal. The ruble fell and everything doubled in price.

The trend I see is that people are choosing the cheaper alternative. Anyone who used to go to the Maldives is going to Thailand. Those who traveled to Thailand are going to Crimea. And some people don’t go anywhere at all.

And there are also people who rented out an apartment, for example, in Moscow, and lived in Thailand. Now it doesn't work.

If we talk about me, I’m still putting off all these trips, but I have my own topic...

Where can a Russian who wants to get away from the frost now spend the winter?

Nothing changed. There are no more budget destinations. You need to come to terms with the fact that everything has become more expensive. And go there for the winter.

If you are looking for an alternative to Thailand, there is none. Thailand, despite the fact that everything has become more expensive, despite the fact that they abolished double-entry visas there, there are no alternatives.

Are there any alternatives without the sea? So that the sun and temperature are +15.

In the budget direction there are Montenegro, Bulgaria, Albania. You could have gone to Turkey earlier, it’s warm there, just that same +15. Now it’s also possible, but not by charter. So, accordingly, if we talk about budget destinations, then these are Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam. If you put them in terms of money, Thailand is the most expensive. Vietnam and Cambodia are cheaper.

Listen, you say “budget”, but after the price change they are no longer budget at all. Are there even cheaper options: Crimea, Sochi, Abkhazia?

They say that in Montenegro and Bulgaria it will be +15 in winter, and it’s cheaper there than in Thailand. But this is not the budget option that it once was. It is now more expensive to travel to Montenegro than before to Thailand.

Therefore, if you choose a completely budget option, then only Russia remains. Because you can come to Crimea or Sochi by train or by hitchhiking.

But is there weather there in winter?

There are probably a lot of offers in Moscow. But for Ufa there are practically no options.

For Ufa, yes. For Moscow, in this regard, it is simpler.

True, now Transaero has been removed, and with charters everything has become worse.

Do you always fly for sales on TurDom?

It depends.

We flew to China with Transaero, there was a direct flight to the city we needed, no one else flew direct there. Now they are gone, now only with a transfer. We flew back specifically with a transfer in Hong Kong to hang out in Hong Kong for a few days. From Hong Kong we flew again on Transaero with cheap tickets. It was a regular ticket purchased on the website of Transaero itself.

In general, we have used the TurDom exchange several times - it was convenient. At least to Thailand. I have never purchased there in European directions.

What are the inconveniences?

The inconvenience is that the flight may be tomorrow, and you need to get ready quickly.

How much can you save with TourDom?

If we compare direct and indirect flights, the savings were ~30%. And if compared with a regular charter, a direct charter could be even more expensive than a regular charter. We mostly flew direct, so we saved money. But for a person who doesn’t care about this, it’s easier for him to buy a regular one, and it will be cheaper. The last time we took a charter for 17,000 rubles, it was a direct flight, and a regular flight could be bought for 13,000.

More life hacks?

I always buy tickets, insurance, book hotels using my links (all travel bloggers do this, but not everyone is familiar with this for ordinary people) and receive a percentage of these sales, essentially a discount (2-10%). I also try to make all purchases with bank cards that have cashback, that is, another 1-3% is returned to me.

UPD from December 30: Oleg wrote about this in the article “Life hack, how to save 5-10% on travel: on air tickets, hotels, insurance.”

Services

What interesting travel services do you use?

I also regularly use Airbnb, all about apartments.

What is the difference between RoomGuru andAirbnb?

RoomGuru is mainly about hotels. There are also apartments there now, but there are very few of them.

Airbnb is private housing, apartments. When you travel with a child, when you need large spaces and a kitchen, AirBnb is economical. A hotel room like this would cost as much as an airplane. For example, a one-room apartment with a simple renovation in Voronezh costs 1,500-2,000 rubles per day. Apartments of the same type in the hotel will cost 5,000.

Regarding tickets... I already said that I use TourDom. Sometimes I look at Skyscanner. I also sometimes check the websites of the airlines themselves. Especially when these are compound flights. True, now I travel a lot with my family, and therefore I prefer expensive options. Minimum transfers, minimum waits.

Still, when a person is left to himself, he has more opportunities. You can buy a cheap ticket to Berlin, enjoy a couple of days there, and then fly on. If I'm flying with my family, then we fly from point A to point B with minimal movement.

Gadgets

I am constantly trying to minimize gadgets and things in my life.

I've noticed that people generally waste a lot of time on junk. First you need to find it, then buy it, then there is too much of it, you need to put it somewhere, sell it, donate it. That is, I am for mobile life, for minimalization, because it’s easier. You can pack up and leave at any time in half an hour. You can also set up your workplace in a hotel or rented apartment instantly.

True, we have slight differences in our family; I am a minimalist, but my wife is not. But from my solo trips, I have concluded that minimalism does 50% of everything.

At the same time, I prefer expensive things. They are faster to buy, you have to search less, they are more functional - this saves a lot of time.

That's why my work computer is a MacBook. You just need a table, you take out your MacBook, and that’s it - you work.

When I went on a trip for the first time, I had a 15-inch laptop with me, which, together with the power supply, weighed 4 kg. At the same time, I also had a mouse with me. And I constantly wanted to connect to a large monitor, 20 inches.

When I bought a Mac, I got rid of everything. I don't have a mouse, a monitor, or a TV.

On the Mac, Retina - double resolution - is ideal for my work. I process photos as if they were on a 22-inch monitor.

Mac has an excellent touchpad - I don’t need a mouse, I forgot about it like a bad dream.

As a result, 4 kg of junk turned into 1.5.

And that’s how I try to approach everything. Therefore, it takes me 20 minutes to get ready for a trip.

How are you going? Tell us about your bag.

I have a 30-liter Arpenaz 27 city backpack from Decathlon (Farid’s note - I remind you about mine):

But there's nothing special about it. I liked it because it is waterproof, and it actually corresponds to this 30 liters, although it looks compact. At the same time, you can hang something around the edges: a jacket, a fleece, even a sleeping bag. There is a laptop compartment, but it is not very secure.

And this backpack fits a MacBook, a camera, an action camera, a power bank (Farid’s note - Oleg wrote about this), chargers, a tripod and some clothes.

Do you have a checklist for fees?

It's all in my head. I know that I will take a laptop, that I will take an action camera, that I will take chargers. By the way, previously all the chargers were scattered around the apartment, but now they are in a travel bag that hangs on the wall:

This is if I’m traveling alone, but if I’m traveling with my family, then we still have traditional suitcases. Because in this case there are much more things. For example, we take a multicooker with us:

We used to take a small teapot with us, because I love drinking tea. You can't drink tea in Thailand.

Things

I read that you prefer touristy things. This is close to me too (note Farida: wrote about this: ). Tell me more.

Things, clothes, shoes - I also approach this from the position of minimalism.

The most important thing is functionality. But it is important for me that the thing looks good so that I like it. Moreover, now you can buy something touristy from practical materials, but looking like a city one.

In short, it doesn't look like sportswear, because I don't like sportswear. I wouldn't wear sportswear all day.

Let me make a reservation right away: I don’t go to theaters or job interviews. I travel, move from country to country, I can go into nature, I can go with a tent. All my leisure time is like this. If there are some meetings in a cafe, with friends, there is no dress code. That's why 70% of my clothes are travel clothes.

For example, I discovered trekking winter shoes - they keep my feet dry, and at the same time, due to the membrane, my feet also breathe. Now I don’t have to walk around in leather boots that get wet quickly, that are hot in the room and that last for one season. Trekking shoes last me about 5 years.

That is, I can not think about it for 5 years. 3 years ago I posted a photo on my blog with an example of what I wear and how long this or that item has already served me. The photo is still relevant, Keen sandals, jacket, T-shirt, still alive:

There are also Salomon sneakers - this is my third pair - they last for 5 years. I bought the first ones in 2005, the next ones in 2010 in France. This year I bought myself a women's (!) model on sale, which was sold at a 50% discount. I noticed it by accident. Visually, she is not at all feminine. Accordingly, until about 2019 I don’t need to think about sneakers. I like them. I wear them in cool summer, autumn and spring, somewhere up to +5.

I also bought inexpensive winter boots from Decathlon. I like them.

In general, as a rule, we don’t come to Russia in winter.

I also have Glagla summer boots, which they gave me to test. Super light, holey sole, everything breathes. It's great in the car in the summer, your feet don't sweat.

After Decaton appeared in Moscow, I often buy clothes there. I won't say it's durable, but it's cheap. I bought myself trekking pants, thermal underwear (a T-shirt and tights), fleece and T-shirts there. That is, Decathlon is also my “life hack” - I can go there and immediately purchase.

I love fleece with zippers. In general, I love everything fleece - practical material. It is warm, but at the same time you sweat less.

I don’t like shopping, so if I find what I need (and this becomes clear after a month of wear), I try to buy it in reserve. These things are in my separate drawer. I don't use them. They are waiting. Some will say that fashion will pass, but I don’t care at all.

I started doing this this year. After I couldn't find the model of the pants I wore for two years. I came to Decathlon two years later, but there was nothing similar or as convenient.

As I understand it, you work with clothing sponsors?

I work, but not much. My readership is not enough for serious contracts. Understand? For 1000 rubles, I’ll somehow buy it for myself. And, for example, my Sony DSLR, which I would love to advertise, is not offered to me. They tend to partner with larger bloggers.

Therefore, some small companies work with me, and, as a rule, they find me themselves. I'm not looking for it myself.

For example, they offered me an action camera. They offered a Thule running stroller (review by Oleg). Then they offered me Glagla sneakers. Now they offer me a Plantronics headset. One day, they offered to install gas equipment on the car. I refused.

I have one friend. He doesn't have any websites, he only has a Facebook profile. But how he knows how to negotiate with sponsors! I remember that for one trip he knocked out his clothes, tent, and all his equipment.

I get a lot of different feedback. I inspire some people to travel with babies, fly with babies, travel with kids to Europe or Asia and beyond... But often they write to me something like “That’s good for you, your children sit calmly on planes and are generally so quiet, etc.” d, but ours won’t sit for anything, but we are hyperactive, but we have this, and we have that...” Explaining to people that my children do not at all want to sit quietly on the plane, sleep when I need to take a walk around museum or sitting decorously and silently in a restaurant abroad is useless. For some reason, it seems to everyone that it’s only their children who want to run around the playground and squeal, and I take mine to art galleries;))) Anyone who knows me knows that children are like children, and my eldest daughter has the biggest booty of 99% of all children and is brought up ( I am reaping the fruits of my own upbringing:) as a free and independent person with all that comes with traveling abroad... But we travel! And we do it in such a way that it is interesting for us and comfortable and healthy for our children!

Well, recently they wrote to me, they say, traveling with healthy children is one thing, but when a child has some kind of health problems, you can’t go anywhere at all. And there was such hopelessness from this letter... Apparently, the mother of a special child has put an end to possible travel and her vacation for the coming years, if not decades. Of course, just when the thought of traveling abroad with a special child is expressed, instead of support, there will immediately be a crowd of “well-wishers” with an “authoritative” opinion! The doctors at the clinic will wave their hands: “How can you, ruin the child, what kind of trips do you need”... However, our doctors are constantly twisting their finger at my temple... Relatives, of course, will also support: “And don’t think about rest, you should stay at home, take care of the child and live near the clinic...” And there is so little experience of those who were actually able to travel with a special child!

That is, I have little experience in Russia, because abroad I often see children in wheelchairs and more. In Thailand, where we lived for a year, I remember: for a whole month they brought a teenager in a stroller in the evening, carried him feet first into the sea, and the whole family watched the sunset. The child had a very happy face! Then I watched an enthusiastic blind girl, to whom, as I understood, her parents told her what the sea and everything around looked like, collected pebbles for her, etc. And once in the Louvre I saw a girl with Down syndrome who was sitting on the floor in front of a painting and smiling...

Daria and Egorka on the plane

Returning to the letter. While reading, I immediately remembered Oleg Lazhechnikov- a blogger, the father of a special child, who not only travels with his wife Daria and son, but also lived with the baby in Asia, and now with him in Poland. And I wanted to learn from Oleg the various nuances of his travels, the difficulties that his family has to face, listen to his opinion and some advice to parents who want to decide on their first travels with a special child.

Oleg, Daria, Egorka

-Oleg, please tell us about your son.

Our son's name is Egor, he is now 2.9. He is deaf, has poor vision and does not yet walk. There is no general diagnosis, because no one can put everything together, or they don’t want to, since the case is not obvious. We ourselves assume genetics, that would explain everything. He recently had cochlear implant surgery and we hope this will help him speak in the future. We also continue to search for the cause, but in the background, because the main thing is still rehabilitation, which will not change even if we find out the diagnosis.

-You used to travel a lot, what changed after the birth of your son?

Since Yegor was born, our attitude towards travel has changed, as their purpose has changed. Now we can go somewhere for the sake of classes for our son, but if classes are not planned, then we still have to take into account a bunch of things.

Airport

-Did you ever have a period when you thought that you would have to give up active travel? What inspired you to travel with your baby, and how did you decide?

Yes, when we found out that something was wrong with Yegor, at that moment all our dreams collapsed. The fact is that after birth we were going to go to Asia for several years, we wanted to travel to different countries. There were even thoughts of moving to Thailand for a long time, trying on permanent residence. It would be very convenient for me at work. But I had to abandon all these ideas and consider other countries for permanent residence. Actually, we are still in limbo.

In Thailand

-How did you decide to go somewhere with your baby for the first time?

We thought for a long time, got ready, put it off, and went. Well, as I already said, now travel is necessary for the child’s health, so travel is good for him and for us. True, now we don’t really get out of our rented housing; my time is taken up with classes, everyday life, and my work. Therefore, I won’t say that it’s super interesting; sometimes I miss my past carefree life.

Lazhechnikov family

-Tell me about your first trip together as a family? How old was your son and about the trip?

My son was 1 year 4 months old. The trip was not entirely rosy. Egor ended up in intensive care with bronchitis, then spent a month and a half in the infectious diseases department, where he picked up local viruses one by one, and we decided to save him. When he recovered for the third time, we urgently packed up and went to the Black Sea. Still, sea air, sun, better food. At that time he became completely thin, so something had to be done.

The time was good, May-June. People haven’t even arrived yet, but it’s already warm, and the first fruits and vegetables have arrived. We lived with friends in a private house and went to the sea. We didn't swim, but we crawled along the beach. The child came to life quite quickly.

Before traveling abroad, did you make any test trips on small trips around Russia, for example? Or did you immediately decide on a big trip?

Before our first trip abroad, we went to the Black Sea, as I wrote above. There were also a number of small trips outside the city. In the summer, of course. We went to visit friends in an eco-village, looked at estates in the Moscow region, and went to the dacha. That is, nothing special, a weekend trip.

And when Egor turned 1 year and 9 months old, we rushed to Thailand for the winter.

Egorka is happy!

-Was it scary to go on your first trip with your baby and what were you most worried about?

Thailand was familiar to us; after all, we had already been there more than once, and our blog is also mostly dedicated to Thailand. We were afraid of something else - to stay. And now, on the eve of next winter, we are afraid again. After all, we still don’t know why Yegor ended up in intensive care from a common ARVI, and now every time he has snot we start to get quite nervous. Now I will omit that in Moscow in winter it is simply a breeding ground for some kind of disease, the problem is different. Egor crawls, which means he is always on the floor in the apartment, where there are all sorts of drafts, etc. Of course, we covered the entire floor in the apartment with special warm rugs, but this does not save the situation. The same problem with walks in winter; crawling in the snow on playgrounds is still a pleasure.

The only thing we were worried about was how Egor would cope with the hot climate. We deliberately flew from summer to summer so that there would be no sharp change, but still, summer in Thailand is completely different. And the long flight really scared us, because our son doesn’t sleep even in ideal conditions, and then there’s the plane...

Classes in Poland

-Did you tailor your trip specifically for the child? For example, did you choose a place that has a good hospital, took out special insurance, etc...?

Of course he did. We had a route planned. First, we went to Samui for 1-2 months, where we watched how Egor would behave. It was also important for us that he could swim a lot and crawl on the sand, because we spent the summer in Moscow traveling to doctors and tests, we needed to recover a little.

After we saw that everything was ok, we went to Bangkok for 3 months. This is not the best city to live with a child, but there we signed up for a center where they work with children. This was the first center where they didn’t tell us that Yegor was still small, but they just took us and studied. We had 3 therapists, and it was in this center that one of the leaps in development occurred. Yes, we ourselves worked with it all the time before, but specialists do it better. Although all new teachers of the deaf are still surprised how Daria was able to teach him at least some words with such severe hearing loss.

I did the usual insurance, but we always tried to rent accommodation that was more comfortable, so that there was always air conditioning and a kitchen, a non-hazardous terrace, and closer to the beach. In Bangkok, we chose an apartment that was close to the rehabilitation center. It was also always important whether there were supermarkets and a hospital in the city, that is, we would not be able to live in the wilderness now.

-Why did you choose Thailand to live with your child?

Thailand is one of the few countries where you can go for more than 3 months. At the same time, there is an acceptable price level for everything, year-round summer, excellent fruit, and a fairly friendly population. In my opinion, there is currently no other country in Southeast Asia where civilization and other parameters will be just as well combined. It is equally important that we already knew this country and we did not have to prepare for the trip, this takes time, and we don’t have much of it. Yes, Thailand has its fair share of downsides, and we would be happy to go somewhere else next winter, however, I don’t see an alternative.

-In general, do you think that with a special child, the trip is tailored specifically to him and revolves around his comfort, or you can still choose where you want to go yourself and optimize the route and conditions, if possible, for the baby...

Special children are very different... And these children also have different parents. It’s hard to say in general, I can only talk about us.

So, we are now basically adjusting the entire trip to suit Yegor. If we don’t do this, the trip will fall apart and we simply won’t be able to stand it. Either they are weak, or they are already tired after several years. If earlier I could stay in a guesthouse with amenities on the floor, now only apartments. If earlier we could fly with transfers, or move around the country by bus, now we have direct flights and rent a car. If earlier we could visit several cities in a week, now we go to one place and sit there forever.

It may not be entirely clear, but travel goals are changing. Why, goals, priorities in life become different. When you see your child take his first steps at 3 years old, even with orthoses and support, this cannot be compared with any impressions of a new attraction. Of course, I still find time and go somewhere, to the old city, to a waterfall, I can go hiking, or somewhere else, but this is more related to work (to write on a blog), or a change of scenery . In general, the need for travel has greatly decreased; I want a calm and boring life more.

“Irresponsible” parents “drag” their children here)))

-Have you ever had to deal with public opinion like “where are you taking your child, irresponsible parents” and how did you react?

Yes, I had to. In general, I noticed that there are a lot of advisers everywhere, although they have no idea what they are talking about. This feature can be written down as characteristic features of the Russian mentality. You can’t pass by and you definitely need to speak out, although no one asked for advice. And the advice is different, from what doctors say to some other tales and stereotypes. Moreover, it is common to forget that people are all different, and what suits one does not suit another, but no, the person advising is simply the right one.

I reacted differently. If a doctor tells me this, then I don’t really argue, it’s useless. Moreover, other doctors say differently. I just always want to tell them that let’s all come to an agreement among yourselves first, and then tell me. Otherwise you will come to one, he will write one diagnosis, and to the second - another. What the heck? And in general, after having a wealth of experience communicating with our doctors, I not only realized that everything needs to be double-checked a hundred times, but also that with those who imagine themselves to be gods and do not lower themselves from their pedestal before discussing with the patient , not worth dealing with at all. If they say something on the blog, then I enter into a discussion only with adequate people, then we can exchange cultural opinions and enrich each other. The baths are inadequate, I don’t have time for them. I'm glad that we have a good audience, trolls don't come in often.

By and large, we are parents, and we decide what is best for our child. We see it every day and have the most sightings.

How Egor sleeps

-What difficulties do you face when traveling with a special needs child? How do surrounding passengers react, how is the road, etc.? Does preparing for a trip have any special features or nuances? Maybe you are looking exclusively for overnight flights...

Our main difficulty is that Yegor does not sleep. More precisely, he is sleeping, but this requires a million conditions. When I see how children sleep in a stroller, in a car, how they are shifted while sleepy, it’s just some kind of wonderful miracle. I won’t go into detail, but Egor somehow didn’t even want to sleep from the local anesthesia, let alone everything else. So, constant motion sickness and waking up 10 times a night are very exhausting, so you will do everything to make your life easier. This is where the need for comfort arises, you save minutes, and are ready to overpay for some little things. Therefore, you won’t be able to move around so easily, no matter what hotel you stay in...

The second difficulty is that Yegor does not walk. You always have to think about what it will be like for him to crawl. It’s one thing to go somewhere with a walking child, it’s another thing to always pay attention to surfaces and think through clothing. For example, in Thailand the asphalt in the city is very dirty, in Europe it’s crawling around. You also think through such things as a park within walking distance from your home, or a children’s playground, spacious housing...

The third difficulty is that Yegor cannot stand still for a second. That's why he doesn't really like to sit in a stroller, he wants to walk (with support), or crawl somewhere, he needs to be constantly entertained if you need him to stay in one place. The most trashy thing is the plane at the moment of takeoff and landing, when you need to be buckled up and sit still. At this moment the child climbs onto his head. It’s about the same thing in the car, he wanders around the cabin and if you try to touch him, you immediately become hysterical. Some will say that you need to get used to it. I will answer them that methods that are suitable for ordinary children do not work with such children. He doesn’t hear you, doesn’t understand, his behavior is disturbed, maybe there’s something wrong with his head. We need special behavioral techniques, otherwise it will only get worse. We were only able to accustom him to a car seat when he was 2 years old. They were able to because at least some kind of communication appeared, and it became clear that he still lives in our world, and not in his own. This is partly due to Thailand and the Bangko Center, after which the boy began to look more like a person and not like a cub.

-How is the issue of luggage resolved? Do you have to carry special food, toys, exercise equipment, strollers, etc., or is your luggage no different from the luggage of other passengers?

According to air travel rules, we can carry a maximum of 3 suitcases, 3 carry-on luggage, and a stroller. This is more than enough for now. We just went to Poland, took 2 suitcases and 2 carry-on luggage. In principle, our luggage is not much different, things are about the same, only the quantity may be different when compared with the minimalists we ourselves were before. We used to travel exclusively with hiking backpacks, but now we have huge suitcases. Let me list some not-so-ordinary things.

— A set of toys, both for the plane and in general.
— Orthopedic shoes and orthoses.
— Cochlear implant and its accessories.
— Compact high chair (otherwise feeding turns into hell)
— Specialized books and manuals for classes.
— Nutritional supplements for food, and we can also take some pumpkin seed oil or buckwheat with us (you can’t buy it in Thailand).
— Multicooker and blender.

Everything, of course, depends on the duration of the trip; if it’s not for long, then we don’t take half of it. Plus a person grows, and something ceases to be necessary. Now, apparently, the blender will no longer be needed, since even though he only eats pureed food, it’s already enough to mash it with a fork.

In Thailand

-Is the attitude towards special children and their parents different abroad and in Russia? I foresee the answer, but I’m interested in your experience, whether they help you with anything, etc.

I can only say about two countries at the moment: Thailand and Poland. Well, if I take personal experience, I’ve read about others, of course.

We really like Thailand for its friendliness. Yes, not everything is so obvious there, and smiles do not always mean smiles, but in general people there are much more friendly than in Russia. And Thais love children very much, and try to touch them and talk to them. I know not everyone likes it, but it worked to our advantage. After intensive care and the hospital, Egor was not very open to this world, and everyone’s attention only benefited him. On the other hand, Thailand is not a country where society is tolerant of people with disabilities; it is probably customary to hide them too, just like in Russia. The only good thing is that being a foreigner you are, as it were, in your own caste, and no one cares about you.

But Poland (and I assume other European countries) is a completely different story. Here no one bothers Yegor, and no one smiles so much, but then you don’t feel special. You are just like everyone else! How cool it is not to catch sidelong glances at yourself! And we’re lucky, we live in Moscow, there are a lot of people here and no one pays much attention to each other. But still, sometimes you have to feel like an outcast when you crawl along with an adult child on the playground, or loudly repeat the same word to him ten times (you have to constantly pronounce everything), or when he behaves like a madman, and some compassionate grandmothers begin to say something about bad upbringing.

I remember once upon a time we were in Germany, in Munich. I was amazed at how many disabled people there were on the streets. Naively, I thought that this is the vaunted Germany and its vaunted medicine; in Russia there are even fewer disabled people. But then it dawned on me that the disabled person there is an ordinary person who continues to live his life, and does not rot in his apartment, because there is no ramp at the entrance. By the way, you are now beginning to notice in all countries how much everything is tailored to the needs of non-walking people...

Happy child)

-What are your future plans for traveling with the whole family? Are you going somewhere?

We are going to China soon, again for rehabilitation. This time we will go for 3 months, they say that after classes the child can go there. A friend's daughter went like this. I don’t know what will happen next, we don’t make plans that far ahead. Perhaps we will go to Bangkok for 2 winter months, or maybe to Spain, we need to wait out the very cold.

In general, it is no secret that we are looking for a country for permanent residence, where we can go with our son and live relatively comfortably there. In this regard, everything is still vague, because it is necessary not only to choose a country that suits our requirements, but also to ensure that our desires coincide with our capabilities. There are many places you can go only through study, but I won’t be able to study yet, I just don’t have time (work, plus Yegor’s business). If I had a good profession, I could leave on a work visa, but this is also not my option.

In Thailand

-Can you give advice for those parents who are just deciding to travel abroad with a special child?

In this case, it seems to me that it is inappropriate to give advice. This is not a pleasure trip. Judging by the forums for special needs children, many parents travel to rehabilitation centers, so we are not the only ones. If you decide to go somewhere, then most likely all the necessary information is already on the Internet, you can follow the beaten path. Internet is power! Yes, priorities change, but you can still travel on your own if you have the desire and goal!!!

geleosan

Cons of Tenerife. We’ll add it to our bookmarks so that if you want to move, read it again and stay home 😜 Don’t thank me! Otherwise, moving is such a hassle. ⠀ 🙈Village. After Moscow, Singapore, etc. There are no skyscrapers made of glass and metal, no breath of a big city, few opportunities for cultural leisure. Fans of megacities should not come here, they will die of boredom. ⠀ 🙈Online stores. I don’t know how it is on the mainland in Spain, but after Moscow, where you can buy even a white line with mother-of-pearl buttons in 2 clicks, this is sad in Tenerife. And there is no resemblance to Yandex.Market. Shopping centers are also sparse. ⠀ 🙈It's cool. If the apartment is chosen poorly (not on the sunny side and in the north of the island), then it will be cool for heat-loving people, 18-20 degrees. Naturally, there is no central heating. ⠀ 🙈Dear utility service. But this applies to many countries, when compared with Russia. ⠀ 🙈Not enough greenery. Not Thailand, or even the forest near Tver. There is more or less vegetation, but it is all in the north of the island. By the way, in the south of Spain (Malaga-Valencia) everything is also bad with greens, in my opinion. ⠀ 🙈Island. It is far from other countries and only by plane. You can't get in a car and go on a trip. More precisely, it is possible, but it’s 2 days by ferry to the mainland. ⠀ 🙈Working hours. As throughout Europe, shops are not open 24 hours a day and some are closed on weekends. From the point of view of a consumer from Moscow, it is very inconvenient. ⠀ 🙈Mañana and carelessness. Perhaps this is characteristic of all of Spain, and not just Tenerife. People are too relaxed, slow and don’t give a damn. They also say that many do not shine with intelligence. ⠀ 🙈Medicine is only provided by insurance, as in all of Europe. If in Russia medicine is free (although this is a controversial issue), then here it is approximately 30-50 euros per person. ⠀ It’s like that right away. At first glance. ⠀