Take everything and leave. “Living on a trip is cheaper than at home” How to leave everything and go around the world. Travel tips. Reaching a new level of reality

Dedicated to everyone who is tired of the fashion for “success”:

Last year, our neighbor, who holds a rather important position, quit her job, rented out her beautiful three-room apartment to a successful young family and went to live in the country. Forever.

She still had fifteen to twenty years until retirement.

The people around were perplexed and twirled their fingers at their temples. Quit this job? Such an apartment? Trade everything for a wooden hut with lilacs under the window and a view of the swamp? It is not normal. Everyone dreams of achieving such success!

And she is absolutely happy.

And he plans to spend the rest of his life on a small wooden terrace, reading books, planting parsley in the square meter allocated for the garden and preparing borscht for the children.

Of course, I'm exaggerating a little.

She is writing something somewhere. He's giving some lectures somewhere. He does something and earns something. But this is so insignificant and tiresome compared to her previous life that it is not even worth mentioning.

Every year there are more and more such people.

Of course, not everyone gives up everything and goes into the wilderness. But they change lives significantly. For example, doctors are leaving to become freelance photographers, and accountants are becoming journalists.

Please note: why are there more and more freelancers every year? Yes, in the age of the Internet and high technology there is no need to be tied to a specific workplace and a rigid schedule from nine to six. But there is something else.

There are people tired of life.

They are trying to force success on us too persistently. Success. Can you give a clear definition of this word?

Since kindergarten, a person is loaded to capacity. Endless commitment. Early rises. Semolina. Quiet hour. Sit quietly. Mugs. Saturday. Early rises. English and drawing. School. Early rises. Lessons. Hometasks. Exams. Exams again. Institute. Early rises. Lectures. Exams. Job. Early rises. Meeting. Reports. Planning meetings. Emergency situations.

Hit your head against the wall. Be successful. “Highly effective people.” Have you heard? Don’t be lazy, don’t get sick, you’ve worked – die. An excellent worker. Every leader's dream. He doesn’t catch a cold, doesn’t get tired, doesn’t go on vacation or to children’s parties, works overtime and on weekends. He wants to be highly effective and successful. Necessary. Do you really need it? You'll get a good night's sleep in retirement. First achieve it.

Throughout all the years of study, they desperately scare and threaten. Study, otherwise nothing will come of you. Study, otherwise they won’t hire you anywhere except as janitors. Study, or else...

Standard set. Two higher education. A successful marriage. Prestigious job. Apartment, car and dacha. The sea a couple of times a year. Paris for a wedding anniversary. Children in the gymnasium. Twenty boots, thirty bags. For the season. Everything is like people. Do you really need it?

Someone once decided that this is all that is success. Are you sure that this is exactly what it is measured in? And is it needed at all?

Success. In fact, this is one of the biggest scams of our lives.

None of this matters.

This simple truth is understood, as a rule, by people who are deeply tired of life, for whom peace of mind comes first. The opportunity to not run anywhere. Don't prove anything to anyone. Live, not survive.

There are people who ran and ran, then fell and realized that they couldn’t do it anymore. Moreover, when we are talking about the new generation of young people who, from the age of twenty, have already held serious leadership positions, carrying an exorbitant burden of worries and responsibility. They have already seen everything, can do everything and want nothing more than peace. A kind of early old age.

Then they suddenly begin to see life in a different light. More often this happens against the background of serious overwork and severe stress. Lying in the hospital, you can understand a lot.

Tired people gradually change everything and change themselves. They learn life anew, completely adjusting circumstances to suit themselves, their needs, desires and biological clocks. Having complete control over your life, not trusting her moods and the decisions of her employers. They paint with watercolors and read a lot. They cook borscht and bake pies. They walk in the park and play ball with the children. They just breathe air. They understand that One bag, it turns out, is quite enough.

They learn to live today and now, feeling every minute.

That is why such a concept as downshifting appeared quite a long time ago, and societies to combat excessive consumption, freelancing and wintering in Indian huts became so popular.

I've been scared since childhood. And now it seems good to wave a broom in the fresh air.

In any case, this job seems more attractive to me than the editorial position of a monthly magazine of more than a hundred pages. When you don't have time to eat or drink a cup of coffee. When at ten in the evening you suddenly remember that you wanted to go to the toilet at lunchtime. When an advertiser calls at eleven in the evening and asks to urgently redo the layout. And at nine in the morning the magazine should already be at the printing house... And then you go down the dark stairs, because the elevators in the building have not been working for a long time. And you don’t call a taxi, but walk a couple of stops to recover a little. And you think that you have to finish the article by morning and be at the editorial office at eight. And at home there is a hungry child and his unfinished essay. And at twelve thirty at night the author suddenly calls and asks to make changes to the text. And in the morning this whirlwind again. And half an hour before delivery to the printing house the chief will come and say: redo everything to hell. How? He doesn't care. Go out on the weekends.

There are people who really enjoy all this. Without getting tired of the crazy rhythm until the end of my life. And they can feel life in all its manifestations. So that's great. Everyone can't be super successful. Not everyone can occupy prestigious positions and run super-successful companies. Someone must and the fallen leaves of revenge.

People tired of life and people chasing success will never understand each other. Clearly, to each his own. But if you feel like you can't take it anymore, don't be afraid to change things up. Don't take life too seriously. She's too short for that.

Naturally, there are quite a few disadvantages in moving to a village for permanent residence, but we will talk about the advantages that are so great that they can cover all the disadvantages.

1. Housing
Buy a decent house 150 km away. from the Moscow Ring Road you can get it for 2-3 million rubles. And a one-room apartment on the outskirts of Moscow costs 5-6 million (prices for 2015). By buying a house, you will provide yourself with housing until you grow old. And in the one-room apartment, you will have to change it to a larger apartment after the birth of your first child.
With the money you save, you can buy several cars, for yourself and your other half. In this case, there will even be a few million left.
So what will you choose? A cramped one-room apartment on the outskirts of Moscow or your own house with a plot and a private car park?

2. Health
You can improve your health in the village at every step. The sound of tree leaves soothes, fresh air heals and cleanses the lungs, walks in the forest relieve stress, depression and chronic fatigue.
A large city puts pressure on a person, its conditions contribute to the constant production of adrenaline. Thanks to this, many people experience a feeling of the speed of life, of constant “movement”. Constantly living in this mode guarantees you health problems.

3. No neighbors, no one bothers you
When neighbors have children, it can be very annoying. Either they stomp heavily, then they scream at night, or they run around early in the morning. The same thing happens when neighbors do renovations. This is because the walls are thin, you can hear everything. Whether you like it or not, you live as one big family. And everyone has to endure it.

4. Food
Nowadays it will not surprise anyone that products from stores are of dubious quality. You can be indignant about this as much as you like, but, alas, nothing can be done about it yet. But you can protect yourself and your family from the tricks of unscrupulous manufacturers. By growing vegetables, berries and herbs yourself, you will learn the true meaning of the phrase “environmentally friendly product”

5. Peace and tranquility
This is, of course, the main reason why you want to move to the countryside. The sleep here is sound and deep, which is facilitated not only by the fresh country air, but also by the undisturbed silence. And in general, this noise here is so exceptional that a rare tractor evokes only pleasant emotions.

6. The ability to gather friends around a large table
Absolutely all the conditions to have a great time with friends or relatives - right in your home. What can replace a barbecue in the fresh air to the sounds of a guitar? This is what will best brighten up a quiet summer evening. Other excellent ways to spend time, unfamiliar to city residents, include relaxing in your own bathhouse and swimming in a lake nearby.

7. No urgent need for money
Living in a village, you can provide yourself with all the necessary food all year round, with the exception of some products. You can earn this by selling surplus from your backyard (eggs, vegetables, etc.)

8. You can step away from politics
In the city, the actions of the authorities are better manifested than in the countryside. In the village, no one simply cares about a person; he lives the way he wants. Of course, without fanaticism - without breaking the laws. In the village there is no such strict control by the authorities as in the city.

9. Expanse for active recreation lovers
There are many more opportunities and places for sports in the village. For example, in winter you won’t need to load your car with equipment and drive hundreds of kilometers to ski in a pine forest. And you can skate on the frozen pond, completely free of charge and without waiting for your session, as happens in the city.

10. Aesthetics
I think there should be no controversy regarding this point. Aesthetics wildlife in no way compares to the aesthetics of the city. These gray concrete houses, slush, dirt - only evoke negative emotions in a person. Is it a beautiful forest, majestic mountains, murmuring rivers, spreading meadows.

Agree that sometimes thoughts arise to quit this hated job, this everyday routine. Get away from the bustle of the city, traffic jams, noise from endless construction projects. Go to a quiet, calm corner where you can feel free and happy.

Naturally, there are quite a few disadvantages in moving to a village for permanent residence, but we will talk about the advantages that are so great that they can cover all the disadvantages.

1. Housing
Buy a decent house 150 km away. from the Moscow Ring Road you can get it for 2-3 million rubles. And a one-room apartment on the outskirts of Moscow costs 5-6 million (prices for 2015). By buying a house, you will provide yourself with housing until you grow old. And in the one-room apartment, you will have to change it to a larger apartment after the birth of your first child.
With the money you save, you can buy several cars, for yourself and your other half. In this case, there will even be a few million left.
So what will you choose? A cramped one-room apartment on the outskirts of Moscow or your own house with a plot and a private car park?


2. Health
You can improve your health in the village at every step. The sound of tree leaves soothes, fresh air heals and cleanses the lungs, walks in the forest relieve stress, depression and chronic fatigue.
A large city puts pressure on a person, its conditions contribute to the constant production of adrenaline. Thanks to this, many people experience a feeling of the speed of life, of constant “movement”. Constantly living in this mode guarantees you health problems.

3. No neighbors, no one bothers you
When your neighbors have children, it can be very annoying. Either they stomp heavily, then they scream at night, or they run around early in the morning. The same thing happens when neighbors do renovations. This is because the walls are thin, you can hear everything. Whether you like it or not, you live as one big family. And everyone has to endure it.


4. Food
Nowadays it will not surprise anyone that products from stores are of dubious quality. You can be indignant about this as much as you like, but, alas, nothing can be done about it yet. But you can protect yourself and your family from the tricks of unscrupulous manufacturers. By growing vegetables, berries and herbs yourself, you will learn the true meaning of the phrase “environmentally friendly product”.


5. Peace and tranquility
This is, of course, the main reason why you want to move to the countryside. The sleep here is sound and deep, which is facilitated not only by the fresh country air, but also by the undisturbed silence. And in general, this noise here is so exceptional that a rare tractor evokes only pleasant emotions.


6. The ability to gather friends around a large table
Absolutely all the conditions to have a great time with friends or relatives - right in your home. What can replace a barbecue in the fresh air to the sounds of a guitar? This is what will best brighten up a quiet summer evening. Other excellent ways to spend time, unfamiliar to city residents, include relaxing in your own bathhouse and swimming in a lake nearby.


7. No urgent need for money
Living in a village, you can provide yourself with all the necessary food all year round, with the exception of some products. You can earn this by selling surplus from your backyard (eggs, vegetables, etc.).


8. You can step away from politics
In the city, the actions of the authorities are better manifested than in the countryside. In the village, no one simply cares about a person; he lives the way he wants. Of course, without fanaticism - without breaking the laws. In the village there is no such strict control by the authorities as in the city.


9. Expanse for active recreation lovers
There are many more opportunities and places for sports in the village. For example, in winter you won’t need to load your car with equipment and drive hundreds of kilometers to ski in a pine forest. And you can skate on the frozen pond, completely free of charge and without waiting for your session, as happens in the city.


10. Aesthetics
I think there should be no controversy regarding this point. The aesthetics of the wild can in no way compare to the aesthetics of the city. These gray concrete houses, slush, dirt - only evoke negative emotions in a person. Whether it’s a beautiful forest, majestic mountains, murmuring rivers, spreading meadows.

Every Thursday in this section we examine pressing issues related in one way or another to the concept of freedom - from the point of view of law, social norms, and psychology. Today we will delve into the fear of our own desire to leave.

Why are we afraid to leave everything and leave?

English psychotherapist Greg Madison used the concepts of philosophy to study the phenomenon of so-called existential migration. He was interested in the experience of migrants who left their hometown or country not for economic reasons, but for the purpose of existential self-expression - searching for the limit of their capabilities, the meaning of existence.

Consulting entrepreneurs who emigrated to England from other countries, Madison, based on his practice, substantiated the concept of “existential migrant”. Unlike other types of voluntary migration (with the aim of increasing economic well-being, more specific tasks or simply a thirst for a change of place), the move made by existential migrants is associated with the need to understand aspects of existence, which cannot be realized at home, in a static picture of the world .

After conducting many interviews, Madison found out that migrants who moved for economic reasons (for work, study, for the purpose of career, material acquisitions), despite the goals achieved, often experience anxiety in a foreign land and more often return home than those who moved with a less definite attitude - the search for new experience, self-development and expansion of the horizon. Among existential migrants, in contrast to economic ones, a pronounced preference for the strange and unfamiliar over the familiar and standard was revealed, as well as a desire for freedom, independence and lack of attachment to home. For them, moving, giving up home is a path to oneself through giving up part of oneself, a way to achieve meaning, which was written about by the founder of the existential direction in psychotherapy, Viktor Frankl (1959). According to his concept, the driving force of human behavior is the desire to find and realize the meaning that exists in the external world - a person feels frustration or vacuum if this desire remains unrealized.

In existential philosophy, fear represents a basic experience that enhances the understanding of existence through awareness of the inevitability of non-existence - death. The object of fear is the force that pushes existence towards the end. During the experience of emptiness and uncertainty, the world is put into brackets, and a person finds himself alone with himself, with his existence, opposed to this emptiness. For existential migrants, this experience is a natural path to freedom from the semantic vacuum of the comfort zone that home and familiar surroundings provide; for business migrants, it is a source of anxiety and an increased need for security. Some leave everything and go into the unknown, finding themselves in an ever-changing flow between the awareness of life and death, while others, having left and coped with economic tasks in the outside world, begin to rush about in an unconscious search for meaning and under the pressure of the need for security and belonging, not are able to move from one level of existence to another - they return home, completing the circle of “flight from freedom.”

In the traditional fairy tale plot, the hero began the path to understanding his true identity only by leaving home and encountering dark forces that embody “nothingness” - a world opposed to human awareness. That world of emptiness, presented in a complex space of unknown gardens, huts, wise old men and forest helper creatures, provides the heroes with the opportunity to find a path to meaning through the experience of death. None of the heroes returns home without experiencing death or death, rebirth in a metaphorical form. Those for whom the meaning of the journey was to satisfy basic needs returned, having “lost their horse”, having found wealth or a spouse.

Since ancient times, leaving home has symbolically expressed the beginning of the path to maturity. The initiation rite, the purpose of which was to achieve adulthood, consisted in the fact that all tribal youth went into the forest, where deadly obstacles were prepared. The one who returned first had the right to immediately choose a wife. The initiation rite included a long stage of physical and moral preparation, without which it would not have been possible to survive in the forest. The rite, the obstacles and rituals associated with it, were metaphorically reflected in fairy tales. Both in them and in our time, it is most difficult for those who have a predominant need to belong to leave home. “Give up everything and leave,” when translated into the language of existential philosophy, means accepting the inevitability of disappearance in the familiar world and transition to another, which guarantees not safety, but a collision with objective “nothing,” an emptiness that requires overcoming by filling it with meaning. This transition is always associated with stress - some cope by achieving an acute awareness of existence, while others live with it in a foreign land and, having never found the firebird, take a step back towards the comfort zone - the existential vacuum.

I didn’t touch the blog for a week, I wanted to give up everything, especially since I was leaving for 3 days. But then I realized that I was using my trip as an excuse not to write anything. I began to analyze. What is happening, why do we often experience such a feeling - “and burn it all with a blue flame!” And this is what happened.

3 reasons why you want to quit everything

1. Hanging out with people who disapprove of you

When you are focused on achieving some result, you are burning with some idea, you are starting a new project, a new business, a new activity, you feel wings behind your back. And so you begin to communicate about this topic with friends, with loved ones, with parents. And someone supports you, says “come on, it’s a normal idea, everything will be great,” etc. What do you feel? Well, of course, even more enthusiasm. And when you suddenly hear “Well, what are you thinking again? Did you fall off the stove? There are a million people like you, and you think they’re waiting for you there?” and stuff like that. Naturally, we feel somehow defeated, and even awkward. Especially if a loved one speaks out of love for us, because he “wishes us well.” You know, I had similar cases in my life, and every time I received a negative assessment from loved ones, I lost a little interest in the new business, and in the end it came to naught. Then, when I tracked this, I learned to resist it. I immediately figure out who I can tell about myself and my ideas and plans, and who I shouldn’t. My naivety faded with age. In addition, I learned to fight back such conversations.

2. Spray

Life is very diverse (fresh thought, haha))). Suppose I set a goal for myself - to get my body in order, and for this I decided to take up dancing. I made a plan to achieve my goal. I wrote how to do this here. But in life, of course, there are other things to do. And then, if you don’t follow the plan, but do it once in a while, sputtering occurs. It’s the same as putting a water divider on a hose, from where a stream of water comes out, and the water pressure is not at all the same, nor is the range. Now we are already busy with dozens of other things, but we do not achieve our goal, and then we feel remorse. This is why writing plans is so important. A plan helps you concentrate your efforts and not get scattered.

3. The habit of living like everyone else

It's like driving in a deep rut on a road that has already been traveled by others to such an extent that it is impossible to pull out to the side of the road and take another road. We are used to working for hire, it is terribly convenient and safe. Go to work from 9 to 18, do what is written in your job description, get paid, not very much, but enough to live on, and that’s it. We also often follow stereotypes such as “everyone has a dacha, and we need it”, “everyone goes on vacation to Turkey and we will go too”, “everyone wants to buy children’s roller skates in Viev and we will buy it”, etc. We often live following other people's goals, and thus, living a life that is not our own. What could be more terrible than this? And it often happens that when we set global goals for ourselves, it becomes impossible for us to follow the usual path, and we are faced with a choice - “to be or not to be?” . Getting out of our comfort zone is both scary and necessary if we want to achieve something in life. So let's follow these 3 rules and we will not go astray from the path that leads us to our goal.

1. Connect with people who support us
2. Have a clear program to achieve the goal
3. Break stereotypes of thinking, get out of your comfort zone, get out of a rut.

And if you still succumb to this “give up everything”, then just notice it, get back on your path, do at least something to achieve your goal, and you will see that you feel better